Diary 4/21 - 4/25

Daily thoughts that may or may not be helpful.

Monday, April 21

I helped Rex fill out his college housing profile. This is basically a classified ad for finding a roommate. You provide details about yourself—how tidy you are, how late you stay up, how much time you expect to spend with your roommate—and the college uses some process, maybe algorithms and AI, to find the perfect match. You can also write and post about yourself; incoming students can scan the classifieds and message you. When I was in college, they didn’t have such a system. They just threw darts at a wall and made matches. This got me thinking—what if spouses wrote a profile for themselves? Or better yet, what if they wrote one for their spouses, now that they’ve lived with them for a while: “Lazy, leaves clothes around, doesn’t put down the toilet seat. Expects you to hang on every word. Forgets essential dates. Projects blame onto others and circumstances. Jokes are used when the conversation gets serious. Squirms if it gets too emotional. Talks too much during movies. But it’s alright because we laugh at the same Facebook reels.”

Tuesday, April 22

Today, I saw a picture of my dad speaking at EnergyCAP’s user conference. EnergyCAP is the energy management software he created in his spare time after teaching himself to code. He made it into a company, and over 10,000 people have used EnergyCAP to save energy and costs for their organizations. For almost 20 years, I helped my dad and brothers build the company. It’s also where I started my career. Three years ago, I wanted a new chapter, so I moved my family to Charlottesville, VA. Seeing my dad at the conference and the company we used to run together brought mixed emotions. I don’t regret moving; I had reached a ceiling in many ways and needed to move on to grow. I love my new life; I am doing things that wouldn’t have been possible before. I am grateful for what came before; it enabled what I’m doing now. I miss living and working in the same town with family. That simple picture delivered a mix of emotions I wasn’t expecting. Maturity is holding multiple emotions at once and being okay with it.

Wednesday, April 23

I’m exploring the idea that we’re all moved by particular motivations at work. One of mine is autonomy, which refers to having freedom and control over aspects of one’s work. For example, if I’m in the office too many days in a row, have too many meetings stacked up, or don’t have freedom in my schedule, I feel trapped. One of the parts I liked about working for myself was that I could completely control when and where I worked. This fueled my motivation for autonomy. So, in my current work arrangement, I sometimes need to work out of the office to get the work done. This breeds more creativity, focus, and energy when my drive for autonomy gets activated. Today I went to a coffee shop and worked for four hours. It felt great!

Thursday, April 24

The Presbyterian Men’s Bible Study was this morning, for which I was asked to substitute as the lead. My good friend, Wes, made the coffee because I don’t know how to make it. The two most essential components of a successful Bible Study are, first, of course, the Bible, and in close second, the coffee. The guys would have been OK if I had not shown up to lead. But if Wes/coffee had not shown up, that’s a different story. We had a great time studying 2 Timothy, where the Apostle Paul instructs his protégé, Timothy. Paul is writing from a dungeon and is nearing the end of his life. Knowing he will die soon, he’s really making his words to Timothy count. My paraphrase of what Paul seems to be saying to Timothy: I’m not ashamed of Jesus Christ even though it’s because of him that I’m in this dungeon; it’s vital to handle the Word of God correctly and not get entangled in things that don’t matter; and make sure what you believe and how you live align with eachother or else you will be disqualifed in the eyes of others.

Friday, April 25

I had a lunch meeting at a restaurant in town. It was the same restaurant where Colette and I dined 18 months before. Around that time, we were discussing whether to buy a dachshund. We may have had a few Sangrias on that particular night, and decided then was the perfect time to buy a dachshund. Thanks to the wonder of online marketplaces, we scrolled through the puppy profiles, like trying to find a college roommate. These puppies sounded delightful: “When I get tired, I will curl up next to you so we can sleep.” Yes, please. “My puppy eyes are ready to melt your heart.” Then, melt away! “I will greet you with joy and a wagging tail daily.” I want that! “My favorite game is fetch, and we can play it all the time.” Then I’d better quit my job! But it was Hopper who stole our Sangria-soaked hearts. We drove to Ohio a few weeks later to pick him up. Whenever I eat at that restaurant, I chuckle to myself and say, “I didn’t know they serve hot dogs.”

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